21 May 07

Time:

?

Money:

$8, usual lunch, usual place.
$just a few, green coat for Marisa, Gap on Broadway.
$0, dinner and margaritas (because Marisa is a lovely and generous friend), Mustang.

More interesting things:

Hit the gym (slowly, but I hit it!) and got the day’s first acknowledgement of my birthday: a little text from Roey. Thanks, man!

Brought some lease-y things to Rebecca’s apartment management company for her. I’d agreed to do it because her life got a little easier without having to come way up to Midtown, but it turned out be a fun reminder of why this city’s so cool. All these business people were (almost literally) running around, delivery guys were rushing breakfasts from here to there, the air was cool… it was an Atmosphere, and one I do like to breathe in every now and then – so thanks, Rebecca!

Went to grab lunch with Professor Alpha and listened to him prove the comments of the day before that he seems to like to make a bit of a scene. This time, he chose a loud but ever-jocular tone to announce that he thought we were being discriminated against in the free-soda department, as there was no D.P. in cans and we were, therefore, stuck with either Diet Coke or water. In case it needs pointing out, this was all quite hilarious, especially in light of the discussion from Sunday.

Sat trying to be quiet and not laugh when Professor Number Four swept in, hopped behind Professor Alpha (who was, unusually, reading something at his desk), and started giving him a full-on shoulder rub that continued for like five minutes. In my opinion, however, the funniest part was the split-second in which Alpha realized someone had their hands on him like that; his very first reaction was to snap his head to the left to see whether I had escaped my chair. Ha – I wish, but I have (slightly) better judgment than that.

Kept trying not to laugh when Professor Number Four started busting out with the swear words. First, in looking over the shoulder he was still rubbing at some faculty handbook or other, he asked, “Who the fuck ever wrote this shit anyway?” A fine question, Number Four.

Continued still further in my quest to avoid giggling (or, worse, snorting) when Professor Number Four asked, rhetorically I think, what all the beer in the corner was for and then directed me to hand him one. Professor Alpha was still looking at his handbook (although by now Number Four had taken a seat) and answered Number Four with a distracted “Sure, sure, have a beer,” so I leaned over as if I were starting to think seriously about getting one. I was positive I was going to get laughed at – like he didn’t really want one, just wanted to harass me – but when I asked yet again, Number Four told me, “Yes! Make sure it’s a black-and-tan. Hand me a beer!” So, still giving an incredulous, wide-eyed shake of the head, I grabbed the top in the hem of my shirt and popped it off (causing Alpha, who had begun rifling through his drawer to find a bottle opener, to stop cold and stare at me for a second before saying “Okay then!”) And Number Four drank it! At 1:00 in the afternoon! In a university OFFICE, for chrissake! I always KNEW I picked the right job this time!

Drank, in an unusually well-behaved turn of events, only my water, causing Professor Number Four to gesture at the bottle as I finished taking a slug, scrunch up his face, and ask, “What’s with this Poland Spring shit?” Holy crap.

Listened to a highly amusing exchange between Professors Alpha and Number Four about suitcases. Number Four asked whether Alpha would manage to keep it down to, say, four, to which Alpha responded by looking at me and announcing (in an as-always unrestrained tone) that “Fucking Number Four manages to pack all his shit in some little tiny folding bag thing, and I don’t understand it! He changes his clothes! It’s not like he just wears the same thing every day!” Really. They should just have gotten married themselves; it might have made things a lot easier.

Reached out, although I wasn’t totally sure I understood why, for Professor Number Four’s now-empty beer bottle. I went to take it from his hand, but he held on to it for a second, bowing his head at me and announcing that I was “a gentleman and a scholar.” This was quite lovely in itself – not just a compliment I can definitely get with but yet another play on the nice girl/happy man thing – but became particularly funny when Professor Alpha, who was STILL looking at something on his desk, sort of turkey-noise-mumbled, “Thank you, thank you,” causing me to choke down a good snort and Number Four to give me a cute sharing smile.

Held on to the bottle cap, just so I don’t forget where it came from.

Shook my verbal finger at Professor Number Four, who had leaned his head into his hands and his elbows on to the table, by announcing, “See? You drink at 1 in the afternoon and now you have a beer headache!” His answer was that no, it was a procrastination headache. This made me laugh, of course, but it also made me feel a little bad for being a scold, so I made it clear I was only kidding by adding that it was actually a good idea to have a beer, because it could be in honor of my birthday. I got the cute and unmoderated reaction to this that I sort of thought might come out – a loud “Happy birthday!” from Professor Alpha in that strangled kind of voice he does, with the canary-swallowing-cat-style smile that typically accompanies this tone, and a quieter but equally enthusiastic “Ooh, it’s your birthday?” from Number Four. Man, I love those guys.

Listened irritatedly when Professor Number Four asked Professor Alpha whether he knew “this woman is not going to be working for me next year” – in fact, I think I might have added a grunt and a fist-pound (very gorilla-like – lovely). Alpha looked surprised, as I hadn’t remembered to tell him, but changed to annoyed when Number Four added that my assistantship would end up being with Professor Fluffy Hair. He got that cat smile on again, though, and leaned back in chair to drip out the words, “Oh, there are ways to handle Jimmy Boy,” before proceeding to tell me that there were “overt” ways to do it (tell him I don’t want to work for him) and “covert” ones (just hide at my desk and don’t go looking for stuff to do; this would work, according to Alpha [and seconded by Number Four] because “he has no idea what a goldmine he’s sitting on in you…. See, you’re not a clock-puncher,” so on and so forth.

Shook hands with Professor Number Four as he took his leave with a “Thank you, guys.” I have no explanation, and I’m not looking for one; that he involved me in the conversation as much as he did Professor Alpha is all I need to know.

Walked Professor Alpha to the phone store. On our way back, he told me that since I’m his social secretary (yeah baby), I should start thinking about getting the “Three Musketeers” together for… dinner at his house, before they sell it (YEAH BABY – try and KEEP me away.)

Got a big fluffy birthday hug as Professor Alpha headed out.

Got a medium-sized, not-that-fluffy but still really nice birthday call from Roey, who asked what I was up to and promised a beer and so on upon his return. Thanks again, man!

Agreed with Anne that it was absolutely imperative to gallop down to The Gap right after class, as they’d suddenly come up with a whole pile of our green coats and had them on serious sale. We got one for Marisa, who seemed to love it – now the Three Musketeers have a uniform….

Wormed out of a “Share and Swap.” Professor Number Five asked for volunteers for the next day, and because she’s so nice she did in fact let me get away without doing it that day. The second-best part of the exchange was what I said to achieve this opportunity – “Well… I guess I can do it… if you want to make me read a whole entire book on the night of my birthday…” – but the very best part belonged to her: “You know, are you Jewish?” Awesome, as usual.